Once upon a time, a.k.a., 2007, Pine Cone and I spent a ton of time chatting on AIM (i.e., the Facebook Messenger of its time). Usually these conversations would consist tortuous Would You Rather…? games (my Libran answer is always “It depends”), but on some occasions, we would… Read More »Official Rulebook to the Game of Placenta Party
In 2008, I started a short-lived blog titled Movies: Abridged, where I would post condensed scripts to the movies I watched. I don’t even remember watching half these movies, which isn’t surprising; I don’t remember key episodes of 30 Rock or Bob’s Burgers, and I’ve watched both those shows recently… Read More »Movies Abridged: Film Synopses for Busy People, Part 1
This post continues exploring my childhood masterpiece, Bird and Kitty (or whatever it was actually called). When we last left off, the series of short stories penned by my elementary-school self was intensifying in emotional depth, as demonstrated in the mean-girlsy plot of the following… Read More »The Adventures of Bird and Kitty: Part 2
It Begins with Diary Lust When I was in first grade, Annie—the nine-year-old deity next door—gave me a diary she never used anymore. It had a dirt-smudged, plastic cover stippled with little geometric designs and red, blue, and yellow flowers. The lock was broken and… Read More »The Adventures of Bird and Kitty: Part 1
From the mid ‘80s to the early ‘90s (and far, far beyond), the artistic endeavors of my young self usually involved royalty, mermaids with long flowing hair and fuchsia lips, and pink star rings. (“What is a pink star ring?” you might wonder, and the answer is a… Read More »The Humble Beginnings of HappiMess -OR- The Little Kid Art Gallery: Part 1
When I was lonely-livin’ on my own in my first apartment, I had no Internet or cable. I cycled through Netflix’s three-DVDs-out-at-a-time, rewatched my own movie and TV show collection, and distracted myself from my woes with creativity. Cut ‘n’ paste poems was one of those… Read More »Cut ‘n’ Paste Poems
I’ve been keeping a journal for so long that it kind of freaks me out: for the most part, two-thirds of my life have been documented. I still have the journal that started it all: a black-and-white speckled composition book that my mom covered in… Read More »My Third-Grade Diary (1993)
In my senior yearbook, my graduating class and I didn’t get a nice chunk of blank space to say whatever we wanted beside our gorgeous head shots. Instead, all the upperclassmen had their photos in the front of the book accompanied by their names, and… Read More »Upperclassmen Say the Darndest Sh*t, Part 1
I inherited my grandfather’s wooden spice rack with the latticed doors and the stoppered glass bottles inside. Instead of dried herbs, I filled them with poignant trinkets, added a label, and created what a friend once called “potions.” Some of them included: Cessation (a dried rose)… Read More »The Potions
During college, I worked as a desk assistant in the dorm (specifically, my dorm, which meant I could stagger down to the desk in the morning in pajamas without ever seeing the light of day or feeling the touch of weather on my skin). Although, work may… Read More »The Smelly, Colorful Alphabet