“Is this a ripoff of Yoshi’s Island?” — Honey Bear (YES!)
In truth, I can only guess what Yoshi’s Island was like—it was for Nintendos more Super than the one my brother and I grew up with. Our Nintendo was hooked up to the TV at the foot of my parents’ bed, where we’d perch and scream about how the other “willed us to die” in Super Mario Bros. 3. Conversely, my mom preferred the quiet, solitary adventuring offered in Link (The Legend of Zelda), which comparatively makes all the sense in the world.
I loved the little booklets that came with the games, to the point where I decided to make my own for games that didn’t even exist, such as
The hearts over the Is only make it all the more official.
If there was any doubt, this is Yoshi:
And here’s a list of what exactly you’re getting into re: this post!:
The burning question: “What’s going on with Yoshi and the jungle?” Here’s your answer:
I’m sure that clarified and explained exactly nothing, but never mind that. Instead, enjoy this drawing of Yoshi fartin’ around with his beach ball. You know, like how you do in the jungle:
The majority of us ’90s kids have the memory of the Nintendo controller burned into our brains:
But there were often slight variances between games in regard to what some of the buttons did, particularly with A and B. In SOME GAMES, those variances were more than slight:
Let’s take a look at how to get through Level 1. As you see, it starts off with a great vote of confidence, but not in the game designer!:
Restoring animals of water? Ramming head first into the rocky foundation of a waterfall? Honestly, what the hell is going on here? I suppose some questions are better left unanswered.
Here’s a high-level overview of the four initial levels that pave the way for rescuing Toad:
Sure, Yoshi can shoot fireballs, go fast, or float at the mere tap of the B button, but he’ll need some help from some special items along the way!
Re: the Dead Heads: “Gein” and “Kerr” were girls in my fourth grade class whom I was mad at. What do you do when you’re pissed at your friends? Why, put drawings of their disembodied heads in an instructional pamphlet for an imaginary Nintendo game, of course—you know, like normal kids do!
Speaking of nemeses:
And because every piece of art back then needed the shoehorned-in presence of a foxy lady:
THE END! Don’t forget to jot down your game strategies on the all-important and oft-left-blank Notes page!
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